Instead, it was Kitten, with her fake fur and her high heels and tight jeans and her elaborately etched glitter makeup, who drew everyone's eyes—a very beautiful Bratz doll.It was Kitten, 23, lip liner slightly darker than her lipstick, lips that I sort of wanted to touch, who made a woman in her forties stare so angrily that her husband forced her to change seats so that her back was to Kitten.And that's what it came down to: “The whole concept of a sugar daddy intrigued me, because even if I were dating someone traditionally, I'd give them money anyway.”In any case, Thurston found no shortage of willing candidates eager to accept his altruism, and he dated a bunch of them at once, feeling like a “kid in a candy store.” Eventually he settled on one very beautiful woman, 28, in real estate, with a Wells Fargo account that he could drop ,000 into each month.
Kitten left home when she was 18 after a fight with her family over a boyfriend, and she wasn't welcome back, not even after the relationship ended. “They were talking shit about it, saying it wasn't a good thing to do.” But Kitten saw it differently; she saw a way out.
She wound up in a program for homeless youth and lived in a shelter. “I wondered how would my life be different if rather than leave a relationship with nothing, I left with more than I came into it with.” She signed up with Seeking Arrangement before she even left the shelter. She wants to become a choreographer, and the money has been really helpful.
But technology has affected this mini-economy twofold: First, as with any Etsy shop, anyone with a good to sell can now easily intersect with someone who wants this good; and second, it has created a culture of righteous entitlement, in which a fringe thing feels mainstream when you find enough people who participate in it.
Seeking Arrangement is just one of several sugar-dating sites, but a popular one.
But on all the traditional dating sites, the women didn't just want sex. Thurston wanted sex, and he wanted eagerness about the sex.
So one day when he was at the gym, he saw this old guy with a very pretty young lady, and when Thurston expressed confusion to his trainer, his trainer explained that the geezer was her sugar daddy and that the young fawn was his sugar baby.
“And I was like, ‘You're not doing anything different than I'm doing, except you're stealing.’ ” Which, sure, those two things seem exactly the same.
A thing people like to do in the sugar realm, when they're being defensive, is they like to tell you how they're doing just another version of what you're doing. We're also both journalists, me and my husband, which is to say that we've been bringing each other down financially and “beneficially” since the day we met.
What is so bad about formalizing the arrangement so that we can all just go home happy?
And aside from that unpleasantness with that woman who scammed him, all Thurston had to wrestle with, really, was the nagging guilt that maybe this whole sugar-dating thing isn't so okay, particularly since he began before his divorce was even finalized. This felt like an ethical dilemma.” But he reminded himself that he was actually helping someone, a poor student, or someone who badly needed the money for, I don't know, medical bills or back taxes or vaping supplies.
He went to some of the best colleges and grad schools. Just ask his ex-wife—even she wouldn't say a bad word about him.