The identity of a prominent New Zealand actor charged with sex crimes can be revealed as Rene Naufahu.
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They’d always found, with less birth control available among the working classes and expensive abortion not an option, that in order to get a girl into bed they had to work really hard at the chat-up lines.
But as for men considering women’s feelings – why should they?
Whenever I reveal I was young in the 1960s, people’s eyes grow round with envy. ’ Well, I was there and I can, unfortunately, remember the 60s all too well.
Then they add, saucily: ‘But of course they say that if you can remember the 60s you weren’t there!
They couldn’t print the word ‘menstruation’, and if a reader wanted to know anything about sex she had to write in to the agony aunt who might suggest she wrote in again enclosing a stamped addressed plain brown envelope into which, but only if you were married of course, she would insert a leaflet explaining the Facts of Life.
My parents, who presumably had sex in order to have me, were totally reticent about sex.
When we weren’t crying, we’d giggle, like the schoolgirls we were, about our exploits, without realising how damaging our sexual behaviour was both to our self-esteem and our souls.
Not every girl behaved quite as I did, but most came under the same kinds of pressures and few can have missed out on the occasional bleak and ghastly ‘one-night stand’, a phrase that simply didn’t exist for my parents’ generation.
If you can imagine emerging from this repressed background into the swinging 60s, equipped with a contraceptive pill that had only recently become the hugely popular and completely reliable form of birth control, you can also imagine how ill-prepared we all were for what was to follow.
True, we’d been brought up to say ‘no’ to sex, but the only reason for that was because we might get pregnant.
They continued to satisfy their own needs and never for a moment considered whether the women they were having sex with found it pleasurable or satisfying.